Before Christmas, I was getting to the stage where I knew I was ready for something more. My body was craving the chance to get out and do something, I was missing human contact and the days that used to feel well filled where getting dull. After three years I was finally at that place I had dreamed of for so long, I was ready to find a part-time job.
Now I know that for most people working isn’t something they typically get excited about. It’s just part of life, something that must be done and put up with, something to pay the bills. But for me, being ready to work made the world feel so full of possibilities, everything felt possible, it was hard not to go round with a mad smile on my face, the years of fighting to get better had worked, the goal I had spoken about for so long felt achievable, I was walking on clouds.
All that I needed to do was find a part-time job that would allow me to work hours that I could manage, 15 a week tops, and get it. Seems simple.
By this point, it had been well over 3 years since I had last worked and my CV had a large gap in from the years of illness. I also wasn’t really sure what kind of job I should be looking for, most of my experience has been waitressing in hotels, something I didn’t really want to go back to, I needed hours that would let me get out of bed at a reasonable time and be back home and ready for bed by 11.
I needed to be choosy otherwise I could burn myself out and end up worse off that I had been, something I was not prepared to do. The chances were this would take a while but I was cool with that.
When my mother came home and told me an outdoors shop was looking for people I thought I would check it out, that was somewhere I could work, I did a bit of looking around on their website and some others and found a position that I quite fancied. After umhhing and arrring about it for a day or so I reminding myself that the worse thing that could happen was that they say no and it was worth applying.
It had been a while since I had to deal with my CV or write a cover letter and even with advice from the internet, it was a painful morning trying to get it right. A few days later I was invited for an interview and despite things getting a little sticky when I said I only wanted to work 15 hours they phoned me that afternoon to offer me the job!
I was more than pleased with myself, not only had I got a job, I had only applied for one and didn’t need to write any more cover letters!
The next day I joined the string of London commuters as I sat on the northern line into town wondering quite how I was going to get through a 9 hour day.
I managed well, adrenalin played a big part but it was by far my best first day of work. I have now had three days. My forth is tomorrow, as I only work two days a week. Fitting ski boots is reasonably interesting (if you like skiing and technical things) and we are busy enough that I don’t have downtime to get tired in.
The day after work is one of rest, knitting, and binge-watching TV but that’s fine, I knew it would be, the fact that it only takes me one day and two 12 hour nights to feel like myself again after a days work is something I’m pretty pleased by, after all, it could’ve been a lot worse.
Working has changed the shape of my weeks drastically, they no longer follow what has become a familiar pattern of kayaking on Sundays and Mondays, knitting on Tuesdays and trying to fill Wednesdays and Thursdays and writing on Fridays.
My novel has been edited so I’m working through that when I feel awake enough, I don’t work on Sunday so I can still kayak (as long as I’m not working Saturday and Monday) and I’m even hoping to go on a ski holiday!
I know there is still a long way to go until I’m am better, but this time last year I thought concentrating for 20 minutes a day was a big deal! So much has changed for the better and I’m filled with hope.
Sorry it has taken so long to post, but life has got busier, I plan on writting at least one every two weeks if I can mange it.
Hope you ahve enjoyed,
The girl with the braid in her hair xxx